Saturn Return

Life has a funny way of kicking my shins once in a while and remind me not to take myself seriously when things fall apart (Chinua Achebe, anyone?). I am currently experiencing a Saturn Return, which means that Saturn has returned to the same place in the sky that has itself occupied at the moment of my birth. Before you accuse me of being supersticious and believing in all that mumbo jumbo Astrology, I cannot find a more logical explanation behind of what is happening currently in my life.

The Universe is showing me some tough love.

Belief systems that I have previously held are put into question during this period of my life. I can see why so many Christians leave Church or abandon their faith in their late 20s or early 30s. Poignant idealism cannot solve life's major problems. And at this point, I have experienced a number of disappointments by Christians, specially by money/power-mongering "Christian" leaders. I am taking some time to re-evaluate and reflect my whole faith/life experience. In other words, I am coming out as a non-religious Christian (oxymoron much?), which means that I am retaining my faith but I am more skeptical on man-made religious structures and norms.

Career: There may be a possibility that I will transition from a teaching career into a publishing career. Don't get me wrong, I like teaching but I love writing and editing.

Family Relations: I've come to accept that nobody is perfect and there will always be a degree of dysfuntionality in each family. Generally, people do not hurt out of maliciousness but are motivated by other personal reasons. All I can do is acknowledge the pain, forgive, set boundaries and move on. Why dwell in the pain? Why be nice to the person who mistreated you? Shessh, seriously you don't deserve that crap. Just move on.

Love Life: To love yourself remains imperative for a healthy love life and sane existence.

Beware of Narcissists: Ha. Ha. I have well learned my lesson. Don't fall in love with one, and if you do...run to the hills!

I am done with being "perfect": Let's face it, we are inherently flawed and broken as human beings. I am done with striving for perfection (as opposed to the more religious and younger version of myself). I just want to be authentic and happy.

This Saturn Return has urged me to re-examine certain beliefs and goals in life. I often lay awake during dark hours trying to answer the question: Am I living out my purpose on earth? AM I? AM I? (Okay, don't stress about it).

Our late 20s is a tough season for most of us. And I totally understand why some people go into drug addictions or weight gain. Or why Britney Spears shaved her head in 2007. No judgment zone. You are allowed to go a little bit crazy...just remember to bounce back.

"Sometimes it's best to let things fall apart so better things can fall together." ---Marilyn Monroe