1/1/11

Our family went to the beach to celebrate the new year. We had delicious seafood, watched the sunset together and talked under the stars at night. I had a wonderful time.

One of the most memorable moments of our day trip was watching the sunset together. The four us were sitting on one bench, huddled together, talking about our childhood and old times. At that moment, I was thinking how incredibly blessed I was to have both of my parents together. Not everyone can enjoy such privilege in life.

Winter reading list

I don't know why I'm posting this but I'm so excited for the Winter Holidays. The following books are in my reading list:

1)The Bible: Psalms, Ephesians and Luke.
2) The Jungle by Upton Sinclair
3) Biography of George Muller

That's all. I'm swamped by finals right now. I have one tomorrow at 8:30 am. That means that I have to wake up at 6:30am and get out of the house by 7:15am. Ugh. 2 more and I'm heading home.

8 days until I fly back home.

Kandom note: I'm craving pupusasss.

Like a Mountain

I love you like a mountain

God of all comforts

My comfort in my suffering is this:
Your promise preserves my life.
Psalm 119:50

Only God can see the tears we don't show to others.
Only God knows a side we don't want other people to know.
Only God understands our troubles and worries.
Only God can take away our sorrows.
Only God can mend a broken heart.
Only God can save us from our distress.

Christmas Carols

Christmas season is here! I would like to list my favourite Christmas carols:

O Three Kings All time favourite because of the catchy melody. Learned it in 2nd grade thanks to Mr. Maddox.

Oh Holy Night - Simply precious.

Carol of the Bells -reminds me of the Midnight before Christmas.

Ding Dong Merrily on High- A charming song.

Away in a manger - One of my first christmas carols.

Campanas de Belen - A Spanish Carol.

The First Noël - Born is the King of Israel.

Feliz Navidad - Feliz Navidad, Prospero año y felicidad.

"I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas from the bottom of my heart!"

Cántico Espiritual

Canciones entre el alma y el Esposo

Gocémonos, Amado,
y vámonos a ver en Tu hermosura
al monte y al collado,
do mana el agua pura;
entremos más adentro en la espesura.

Y luego a las subidas
cavernas de la piedras nos iremos,
que están bien escondidas,
y allí nos entraremos,
y el mosto de granadas gustaremos.

Allí me mostrarías
aquello que mi alma pretendía,
y luego me darías
allí Tu, vida mía,
aquello que me diste el otro día:

El aspirar del aire,
el canto de la dulce filomena,
el soto y su donaire
en la noche serena,
con llama que consume y no da pena.
----San Juan de la Cruz.

Unión con Dios

Y no se aquieta en este primer grado de purificación, sino que entra en la vía iluminativa, en que la noche de la fe es su guía, y como las potencias de su alma son fauces de monstruos abiertas y vacías, que no se llenan menos que con lo infinito, pasa más adelante, y llega a la unión con Dios, en el fondo de la sustancia del alma, en su cetro más profundo, donde siente la respiración de Dios; y se hace tal unión cuando Dios da al alma esta merce soberana que todas las cosas de Dios y el alma son en transformación participante, y el alma más parece Dios que alma, y aun es Dios por participación, aunque conserva su ser natural, unida y transformada, como la vidriera la tiene distinto del rayo, estando de él clarificada.
--Menéndez Pelayo

His Grace

"In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace which He lavished on us. In all wisdom and insight He made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His kind intention which He purposed in Him with a view to an administration suitable to the fullness of the times, that is, the summing up of all things in Christ, things in the heavens and things on the earth. In Him also we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to His purpose who works all things after the counsel of His will, to the end that we who were the first to hope in Christ would be to the praise of His glory." Ephesians 1:7-12

The sickness of the soul

A sweet love which bloomed in Spring,
grew strong in Summer's radiance,
but weakened in Autumn's grievance,
withered and faded with winter's sting.

Thoughts that spread like cancer,
Bombards my feelings with vile ulcers.
My soul is weary, sick and beaten.
I stand asunder, sad and broken.

I Wake and Feel the Fell of Dark

I wake and feel the fell of dark, not day ,
What hours, O what black hours we have spent
This night! what sights you, heart, saw; ways you went!
And more must, in yet longer light's delay.
With witness I speak this. But where I say
Hours I mean years, mean life. And my lament
Is cries countless, cries like dead letters sent
To dearest him that lives alas! away.

I am gall, I am heartburn. God's most deep decree
Bitter would have me taste: my taste was me;
Bones built in me, flesh filled, blood brimmed the curse.
Selfyeast of spirit a dull dough sours. I see
The lost are like this, and their scourge to be
As I am mine, their sweating selves; but worse.

Gerard Manley Hopkins (1844-1889)

Victory

My love,


Where is your strength?
Where is your armour and sword?
Where is your joy and peace?
Do not slack, or sleep
or pause a moment,
for the enemy is fierce.
He is most threatened when you are doing the will of God.
Be alert and do your first works.
Draw near to Me,
Fill your spirit with the daily bread
and follow the footsteps of the flock.
I desire that you conquer all things
with overwhelming victory!

Hold me.

Nevertheless I am continually with You;
You hold me by my right hand.
Psalm 73:23

Your love never fails to make me smile :)

Today, I was on the verge of being extremely emotional (ugh mood swings), but God cheered me up by answering my prayers and by the beautiful autumn weather.

-After praying this morning, Access and Diversity finally replied my email. I will be contacting my clients shortly, and I will be tutoring English and History to UBC students. I'm excited.
-I made the stupid decision of not buying a book at the beginning of the term. Turns out that they are not selling at the UBC bookstore anymore. After frantically searching all bookstores in town, I desperately sent an email to my History professor. I prayed on the bus and when I reached home, I checked my email and my prof said that he will lend me the book for the weekend. PHEW.

Conclusion: I love God. He answers my prayers and cheers me up with surprises. Life would be totally different without Him. I'm glad He is in my life.

A little lovely thought

I was pondering upon the significance of love in our lives. Here's a little trail of thoughts:

Love
makes things easier,
make conversations less awkward,
helps us to develop our potential,
makes us more human,
is the source of our inspiration,
is divine
helps us gain confidence and value,
erases all bitter feelings,
fully accepts and rejoice,
makes us smile,
brightens our day,
gives us hope,
gives us strength to endure,
can change a person,
can change the world,
can make a big difference,
can help us look beyond a person's fault,
gives us great hope in life,
saves us from despair,
motivates us,
and encourages us.
Love is the greatest.

I concluded that in order to make the world a better place, we need to give our love to others. We need to love ourselves and one another. But where does this love come from? It comes from God and it overflows to our lives. True love can only come from God.

Love can make a difference. If we loved the poor, we would not stand indifferent and not help them. If we loved our parents, we would try our best to hold our temper and not yell back. If we loved our friends, we would support them and accept them. If we loved those around us, everyone will be happier and more content.

I still need to learn how to love. It's a process...a bit painful, but totally worth it!

Refleción del día

Estas 2 semanas han sido totalmente horrible para mí. Como Mr. Palencia diría: Brutal!

Tuvé que escribir 4 parciales, un ensayo de 1500 palabras y preparar una presentación de grupo en 8 días. Estuvé trabajando a más no poder. Mis ojeras son tamaño elefante, he perdido peso y no estoy en un buen estado de animo. Quiero dormir y comer bien pero el trabajo me lo impide.

Pero a pesar de todo esto, Dios es misericordioso hacia mi. Hoy, después de pasar seis horas en la biblioteca (subterranea, para más fregar!), alcé mis ojos al cielo, y vi nubes cirros pintados de color rojo y oro. Al otro lado, estaba la luna llena, esclarecida y hermosa, reposando en la tenue luz otoñal. El cielo se vistió de gloria. Dios me alegró el día a través de su maravillosa creación.

Y ahora estoy aquí, reflejando sobre mi vida. Estoy viviendo en un desbalance. Me estoy preocupando en salir bien en mis estudios que a veces me olvidó de las cosas importantes en la vida. Me hace falta acercarme a Dios y congregarme en Su familia. Por primera vez en muchos meses, falté a la noche de oración. No tengo fuerzas suficiente fuerzas la verdad. Dios me entiende.

Gracias a Dios que ya casí termino. Solo me falta terminar esta presentación y me voy a tumbar en mi cama. No aguanto. Quiero abrazar mi libertad y a mí Dios mañana en la mañana cuando me presente ante Él. :)

Que rico expresar mis pensamientos en Español.

To Solitude

O solitude! if I must with thee dwell,
Let it not be among the jumbled heap
Of murky buildings; climb with me the steep,—
Nature's observatory—whence the dell,
Its flowery slopes, its river's crystal swell,
May seem a span; let me thy vigils keep
'Mongst boughs pavillion'd, where the deer's swift leap
Startles the wild bee from the fox-glove bell.
But though I'll gladly trace these scenes with thee,
Yet the sweet converse of an innocent mind,
Whose words are images of thoughts refin'd,
Is my soul's pleasure; and it sure must be
Almost the highest bliss of human-kind,
When to thy haunts two kindred spirits flee.
----John Keats

Prioridades en la vida

A veces me pongo a pensar, cuales son mis prioridades en la vida.
Estas son mis top 5:

-Dios, mi Gran Amor.
-La gran comisión, mi deber como Cristiana (Mateos 28:16-20)
-Mi Familia y su bienestar.
-Mis estudios y mi carrera.
-La felicidad (la cual se deriva de mi relacion con Dios y los demas)

My hands are in the air, catching the rays of life

Life is a dream

We are such stuff
As dreams are made on; and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
---The Tempest
Act 4, scene 1

Kandom note: Mario Vargas Llosa won the Nobel Prize in Literature! I'm so proud of Spanish speaking authors. Estoy orgullosa de Latino America!!

As kingfishers catch fire, dragonflies dráw fláme;

As kingfishers catch fire, dragonflies dráw fláme;
As tumbled over rim in roundy wells
Stones ring; like each tucked string tells, each hung bell's
Bow swung finds tongue to fling out broad its name;
Each mortal thing does one thing and the same:
Deals out that being indoors each one dwells;
Selves -- goes itself; myself it speaks and spells,
Crying What I do is me: for that I came.

I say more: the just man justices;
Keeps grace: that keeps all his goings graces;
Acts in God's eye what in God's eye he is --
Christ. For Christ plays in ten thousand places,
Lovely in limbs, and lovely in eyes not his
To the Father through the features of men's faces.
---Gerald Manley Hopkins

The first time I read this poem, I thought "what the...?" but I have been digesting its contents over the years. More so, I have found myself in this poem. We live life for a reason. Hopkins called it "inscape" -our inner capability of doing of what we are for. The 'selves' refers to us; each one of us do according to what we are.

Yes, we are humans, we make mistakes. But we have Christ that "plays in ten thousand places." This is my favorite sentence in the poem, since it has so many layers of meanings. It could either mean that we are created in God's image, or God is playing an important role in our 'selves.' He is constantly molding us into perfection.

Even though I feel like I have no particular direction in life, useless and sometimes stupid for not reaching my goals, I will try my best to live my life as a human being. I will love others just as I love myself. I will serve and love God above all. I hope you will do too.

So yeah, it can pretty sum up that I am an existentialist. I believe that there's a meaning of life, after all.

(written in February 23, 2007)